The Loss of a Friend – How to Cope With Your Emotional Pain

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What is life without friendships or companionship? Unfortunately, there are people in our world who know this feeling all to well … there are people who have lost some great friends.

A friend is not just an acquaintance from work, Friendship is much more than an acquaintance. We all have different levels of friendships. Trust is the core of a relationship; love is a huge part of a friendship on many different levels. You can love and still not trust, which usually makes for a very limited friendship.

What about friends you love whole-heartedly and trust with your life. This could be a pet, a best friend, a spouse / special companion, or someone you know through work. Think about the level of trust and the level of love we have in each situation … Like is a level of love.

Here is a poem by Kay Andrews, which is worth mentioning:

"The True Meaning of Friendship."

There is no greater blessing than an understanding friend, who's there in times of trouble and on what we can depend. A friend who knows our every mood And brightens cloudy days, One who's slow to criticizeize But quick to offer praise. There is no greater blessing than a friend who always cares, One who will remember us in daily thoughts and prayers.

Thank you for your friendship! Love from – Kay Andrews

As an adult, when a friend dies you lose not just the gift of a friendship. You also lose security, love, and a sense of peace and safety. Your world is suddenly lonely, a feeling of loss, some may fall into a long-term depressed state of mind.

Others around you may not understand the degree of loss you are suffering. We are all human therefore we are imperfect beings, who are not always in tune with others feelings. We are not intentional ignorant of others feelings, our environments can often cause distractions. It is important for the person suffering the loss of a friend to let others know how they are feeling.

One thing, which works for me and is a huge benefit … is taking sometime to myself and writing a letter to the person who has passed on. Write the letter as if you intend for them to receive it. Once you are done saying everything you want to say to your friend, fold it and keep it in a safe place for some time or if you prefer throw it out. Most times this one simple exercise helps so many people deal with the death of a friend. This is definitely a worthwhile exercise and it is highly recommended.

As a youth, when a friend dies this is very devastating and quite often not fully acknowledged. There are times when children are expected to die which is devastating enough, however it is in those moments when a child dies suddenly and unexpectedly that friends are left shocked and in disbelief. The death of a child / youth would be acknowledged in the community and in the school but only briefly. People may wonder why a child / youth is not recovering quickly.

We need to identify with the child / youth, and since most of their day is spent at school the best strategy would be to contact their teacher, in an effort to put a plan into place to help the mourning child / youth.

In summary, having friends is a true gift, which we should never take for granted. We need to appreciate each other everyday, as we never know when a sudden change of events will take our friend (s) away from us.

By the same token, we can not worry everyday either; I want to leave you with this:

The song sung by Country Superstar Garth Brooks – "The Dance" – says it all … Here is the chorus- "And Now I'm Glad I Did not Know; The Way It All Would End; Go; Our Lives Are Better Left To Chance; I Could Have Missed The Pain; But I Had Had Had To Miss The Dance. "

 

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